Involving everyone in your family strengthens family bonds.

 

Social Development Strategy tells us that family bonding can be strengthened by:

• Increasing children’s opportunities to be actively and genuinely involved at home in ways appropriate for their ages.

• Teaching children skills needed to be successful in completing a task.

• Recognizing children’s efforts in keeping with family values.

 

As children become older they are seeking independence. Having more responsibility at home is one way to exercise that need while keeping family bonds strong.

 

What can we include our children in so that they are more involved in the functioning of the family?

• Family decision making (i.e. making family weekend plans, planning family trips)

• Self-care, responsibility for self and home (i.e. making their bed and cleaning their room, walking and feeding the dog, yard work, making shopping lists)

• Responsibility for personal health (i.e. showering, teeth brushing, hair combing)

 

It is crucial to teach children the skills needed to do a task effectively. It is recommended to break the tasks into small steps. For example: 

• Separating lights and darks for laundry for a young child. 

• Reading a recipe and making a shopping list for an older child 

• Teaching an older child how to mow the lawn and do yard work 

 

It is important to demonstrate each step and have the child join you in the task. This is an example of hands-on learning. You may need to practice this several times and that is okay. Each child learns differently and in a different way.

 

It is helpful to make a daily checklist of expected chores. Be sure to give positive feedback and make helpful suggestions on how they can improve. Explain to your children how the skill they are learning generalizes into other situations. For example, mowing the lawn is a big contribution to the beauty of the yard, and sorting lights and darks in the laundry ensures that everyone’s clothes come out cleaner.